Deacon Mike Meyer / Sunday, November 3, 2024 / Categories: Blog, Homilies Rules! Homily for the Thirty-first Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year B Imagine, for a moment, that we lived in a world without rules. What would you do first? Use a number 3 pencil on a Scantron test? Run with scissors? Help yourself to a Lamborghini Diablo in the parking lot of a local dealer and take it for a 100-mile-per-hour spin down Route 78? If I lived in a world without rules, I’d go to the Lindt Chocolate Shop in Princeton and freely sample all the chocolates to my heart’s and stomach’s delight. As fun as it might be to have no rules for a while, rules govern our secular and spiritual lives for a reason. While we probably understand why we need to stop on red, go on green, and not pick our noses, the reasons behind God’s and the Church’s rules may be less clear, so let’s take a look at them. The Catholic Church is often criticized for having too many rules. As Catholics, we have to attend Mass on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation, receive Communion at least during the Easter Season, and observe days of fasting and abstinence, to name a few. The Church does have a lot of rules, and sometimes these rules interfere with what we want to do. For example, by noon on Good Friday, all I want is a lousy sandwich, but the Church says I can’t have it. Why? Well, rules define us as a people, so if we call ourselves people of God, we need to conform our lives to God’s life. Our God is a rational, self-sacrificing, and unfailingly loving God, and God created us to be that way, too. Rules like fasting and abstinence on Good Friday help us learn self-sacrifice; rules like the Golden Rule help us learn how to love. As Moses tells the Israelites in our first reading, we grow and prosper when we follow God’s statutes and commandments and live as God intends for us to live. God’s rules aren’t punishments or restrictions; they’re the road maps and guardrails that lead us safely to the true happiness and fullness of God’s life. Yes, there are a lot of rules, 613 in the Old Testament alone, but Jesus shows us in our Gospel that they all boil down to just one: love. Ultimately, every one of God’s and the Church’s rules are about love. They help us love God and love our neighbor, and that’s God’s life in a nutshell. As Jesus says, when we understand the love that undergirds all of God’s statutes and commandments, we aren’t far from Heaven. Over the past few weeks, Fr. Chester and I have been discussing some of the challenges our parishioners face with Church rules. One topic that keeps rising to the top of our list is marriage outside of the Church, which Fr. Chester has asked me to talk about today. Now, those of you who are married in the Church may be tempted to kick back and turn off the homily at this point, if you haven’t done so already, but please don’t. There’s a lot of misinformation out there on this subject, and you likely know one or more Catholics who’d would benefit from hearing it. We need your help spreading the word. Let’s start with some background. Catholics believe that Jesus raised marriage to the dignity of a sacrament. As a sacrament, marriage becomes a visible, effective sign of God’s love. It both points to God’s love in the marriage and makes it present. In a sacramental marriage, the relationship between a husband and wife mirrors the spousal relationship between Christ and his Church, and the couple accepts a vocational role in fulfilling God’s plan for humanity as ambassadors of God’s love. Through the sacrament of marriage, a husband and wife welcome and acknowledge God’s presence in their marriage and receive the power of God’s grace, which helps them keep their commitments and find true love and happiness together. If that weren’t enough, social science studies indicate that couples who recognize God’s presence in their marriage experience more satisfaction and are more likely to remain in lifelong partnerships. Now, the rule: Catholics enter a valid marriage only when they receive the sacrament of matrimony or have that obligation waived by the Bishop. For Catholics, civil marriages and marriages performed in another denomination without permission aren’t valid in the eyes of the Catholic Church. The sad consequence is that Catholics with invalid marriages knowingly or unknowingly separate themselves from the fullness of Catholic life. They exclude themselves from receiving Holy Communion and can’t be a godparent or Confirmation sponsor. The Catholic stance on marriage may be a tough pill to swallow for some, but the Church stands ready to help through a process called convalidation. Derived from the Latin word for “firming up” or “strengthening,” convalidation is a ceremony where a couple in an invalid marriage exchanges vows before a Bishop, priest, or deacon in the presence of two witnesses. Convalidating an invalid marriage isn’t just about following rules. It returns the couple to the fullness of Catholic life, bringing them peace of mind and heart, great joy, and the spiritual blessings of receiving our Lord in Holy Communion. Convalidations are confidential, and in most cases, the preparation and the convalidation are simple and pretty quick, though cases where one or both parties need an annulment can take longer. We help you take care of that, too. Many Catholics today have entered or are pursuing invalid marriages. It may be that the couple wasn’t aware of Church teachings or didn’t have access to a Church ceremony during COVID. Some people may not have been practicing their faith at the time, and others may have preferred to be married by their cousin Vinnie on the boardwalk of Seaside Heights. The reason doesn’t matter. If you’re in an invalid marriage or if you know someone who is, we’re here to help, and we want to help—no judgment or condemnation, just help. I do a lot of convalidations, so I assure you, you’re not alone. If you’re still uncertain or nervous, I know many people who’ve convalidated their marriages who’d be willing to speak with you. As tempting as a world without rules may sound, our lives would quickly devolve into absolute chaos without them, and we’d be miserable. While we often chafe under rules, they’re there for our own good, especially when they come from God. Every rule that comes from God is forged in love and designed to lead us to Heaven’s eternal peace and happiness. Yes, God and the Church have a lot of rules, but if we conform our lives to God’s life by keeping God’s statutes and commandments, we’ll soon find that we aren’t far from God’s Kingdom. Readings: Deuteronomy 6:2-6; Psalm 18; Hebrews 7:23-28; Mark 12:28b-34 It’s No Secret I Feel Fine Print 106 Please login or register to post comments.